kayakking | (no subject)

It makes no sense but it works.

All the time, the real proof of withcraft was already here.

I always knew Martin had some supernatural disposition. Should have known it was this all along. Do you remember that stew he brought in once? I still have no idea what was in it.

Right? We've never had more people in the breakroom. I didn't even know Janet still worked here.

Astounding really. Glad he's on our side, could you imagine the kitchen warfare he could start?

Right? We wouldn't just lose. We'd be obliterated.

Twice. There's two of them and only three of us.

I'd have no hope. I can handle some recipes but the things he makes when given the chance? Easily the winner here.

On the plus side, if we lose miserably enough, maybe they'll take pity on us and we get more of the potato and cheese pirogi.

Show belly, fill belly. Lose-win.

The winning like that in the end is the important part I feel like.

Of course I haven't done any cooking for you all yet. I'd like to. [YKNOW. Before it's nearly impossible.]

[Things Tim hasn't even THOUGHT about, accessibility in areas like the kitchen... things that will be apparent REAL FAST..]

Hm. What do you have on offer?

Good proper English meals for one. Steaks, meat cuts, that sort of thing. Some good proper starch sides.

Go heavy on the sides and I'm in.

[Does he still count as a vegetarian now? Fuck if he knows but he is SO not looking at that closely until forced to.]

Deal. Easy enough to do for you.

Could get something like that going. Tuck out to the butcher, see what horrible devastation's left at the grocers.

I'm sure there's something out there, calling our names to be used.

[There's a laugh at that.]

Right, just need to be out there to hear it.

Oh, important disclaimer: I take no responsibility for other purchases that happen at the same time. Those tins of cookies are deadly sirens on the rocks.

They shouldn't make those tins so enticing. But I wonder if they'd have any of those enormous veggie platters left. The ones meant for ten people?

Oh, the ones with enough hummus to drown a toddler?

.. Good point. Might be worth snagging one of them...

I think so. They only put those things out around this time.

[Something easy to grab for in the aftermath. Something not requiring effort or time.]

[As absolutely none of them are going to have the time, attention or nerves to do anything else.

... And easy to handle.]

Right. Other times it's just sad celery sticks and ranch.

Maybe some carrots.

No, we should definitely look into that. Maybe a ham platter as well.

Might be easier to duck out now before everything else picks up.

[... He looks over at Jon. They'd danced a long way around this, time to dip a toe in.]

Yeah... you doing all right?

[They had. His eyes are focused on the room, on the other Jon and both Martins enjoying themselves. The lights, the atmosphere.]

For now, yes.

It's [Following that look...] not bad at all.

[A slow, deep inhale.]

No, it isn't.

[He doesn't look away, enjoying the sight.]

Tim... You know once I do this, there's no going back.