kayakking | (no subject)

You think something might be deep enough that when its cut off, something else might creep in.

[Like what happened to Tim...]

....The possibility is always there.

[Takes a long drink from that can in front of him.]

I'll keep a watch on him after. Make sure nothing happens.

... Good. Thank you.

[Yeah, that is an excellent idea. Bottoms up.]

I mean, it's always been the ideal scenario that he'd actually look after himself. [He cracks a little bit of a smile. It's wan with the ... well, with everything still processing. But it's Tim. He's gonna manage.]

So, I guess a second, more experienced himself will do the trick.

He's got the three of you as well. He can't go too badly with that.

I'll just have my eye on the ...less obvious things.

Right.

Right. There's going to be a lot in just... making sure he's okay coming through this.

Yes.

I... I think he'll do fine. You've all got a plan set and ready, and Martin seems keen to look after him.

[He watches Tim; now that he's gotten to tell him everything, he... desperately wants that comfort he was testing earlier, before. It still strikes him off guard that he can have this with Tim.]

[Tim's posture is easy, a slight lean in Jon's direction without much of a care. As the tiny bit of alcohol erodes that constant composure he usually wore like armor.

But it's also not that comfortable, intimate closeness of the couch, either.]

Martin cares so much it hurts, really. They're going to be fine.

And, I'll help as much as I can.

[With Tim leaning in, Jonah goes the rest of the way, shoulder to shoulder. An easy weight considering even an unwilling king of hell, he's... still Jon. Still tiny, and without the need for food, does he really have any other weight?]

I know you will. It's... I'm glad.

[He really does not. But Tim curls an arm around him, this one loose and familiar, hand settled at Jon's hip.]

It's... good? I mean, once I get past the cognitive dissonance of time travel in actual application.

... I think I have a much clearer idea of how badly things were going to go.

[Ah. That is a feeling there. Familiar, easy. Not something he has to question with its placement. He scoots his chair closer, leans a little heavier against him.]

Yes. It was... Going to be bad. I'm sorry, Tim.

You of all people don't need to apologize to me.

I meant, sorry you're. Seemingly stuck with a broken monster here.

I think I'm fine with that.

[Jonah blinks to him at that, curious and a bit disbelief.]

Are you really.

Yeah? I mean, it's you.

[There is the strongest disconnect there. The Tim he knew, said last goodbyes to before that horrible night, who hated monsters, went out of his way to avoid everyone because he couldn't trust they weren't monsters.

And the Tim here, telling him it's... all right. That he loves the monster in front of him, who's been open and honest about how inhuman he is.

The confusion is clear on his face.]

After I. I just- explained the whole. Being a monster thing.

[And this Tim had, even when the wavering form of Algric shuddered in and out of his perception and memory that first day. He still did when Jonah stumbled out of Hilltop. He still did when arms desperately went around him and a forehead pressed into his chest, despite the smell of burning protein and fiber overwhelmed the choking concrete dust and boiling wax.

He still does now.

There's just a specificity now he didn't have before. Was it a double standard? Was it wriggling on the line he, himself was caught on? Probably. But it was THERE now, sharp and stark.]

... You know, there's not been one moment since that narrative ended, that you haven't been there for me. I'm not-

[He tries again.] I don't hate you. There's only one person that story made me all out hate and that is not you.

[His voice is quiet, carefully measured. There's a wide world between 'I don't hate you' and 'I love you'.]

It feels strange to say 'thank you' but. I. Am coming to accept I'm ...capable of loving more than one person? But I. I do. Love you, Tim.

[There's continents of emotion between 'I don't hate you' and 'I love you.' But at Jonah's declaration, Tim's expression goes on a journey, taking in that proclaimed sentiment greedily and wrapping around it.]

God, I'm so glad. [His fingers slide along Jonah's cheek, a little too warm, a little too smooth.] Because I really love you too, Jon.

[All this feeling he could've had before if he'd trusted, or had a bit more confidence in himself at the moment. Make up for lost time now, he supposes. Jonah leans his cheek into that hand, desperate for touch; he loves Algric, is going to marry Algric, but he's understanding he's selfish for wanting this too.]

You know once I fill out the papers Martin gave us, that won't be my name anymore? So. Use it while you can.

I mean, you can still keep it. But yeah, whatever you want, I'll go with.

We'll see, I suppose.

[He leans into Tim's side a bit more, ignoring how uncomfortable it is in these chairs at the kitchen island. It's just... Nice.]

Either way, I'm. Not leaving. So. You... have me here.

[It... really is nice. The warm pressure, the sentiment. He ends up smiling like a god damned fool. He looks at Jonah a moment and-]

... We should get a last drink and take it to the couch, because it is gonna be real awkward to kiss you here.

[That startles a little laugh out of him, sitting up again.]

Last call, then?

Exactly, put in your orders, no going back from here.