[ He breathes deep and careful, cooling the jump of fire in his veins. He thinks about asking if Jonah's okay but... good lord, how COULD he be? Even if he'd admit it at the moment, and he knows how stubborn Jons get.
And he didn't trust them.
He rubs at his face. ]
Well, at least you got to kill him. There's the bright side.
[Gods. He can't help how he fiddles with his fingers, rubbing at them absently. Not there, they weren't there- he can almost feel the line of where skin and bone had stopped if he focuses hard enough.]
I did.
[Maybe that was why he had gone. Of course there was the anger of being lied to and his trust broken, and maybe the strings he couldn't see tugging him, but maybe he'd also gone for his own revenge. His own wanting to end things on his own terms himself.]
[ Maybe if he'd VOICED WHAT HE WANTED BEFOREHAND... Well, it would have been it's own series of arguments.
What now. That's the question. ]
That's going to depend. I'm not going to pretend I'm not an absolute mess of ... everything right now. [ Smooth and elegant, Stoker. But he can't quite find a word that encompasses the maelstrom behind those very level words. ]
I want you to stay. I want to work things through. [ That was just the barest fraction bubbling up. He takes a deep breath. ] But I don't know what you want yet.
To live peacefully? To be understood? To take Elias' office and see everything? To take the throne below, his rightful position and his rite now that it's empty and calling-
Jonah moves both hands to under the table, one gripping the other tightly. Ignore the weird feeling of where his skin feels different along the knuckles. Feels a hairline crack in his ring.]
I'm not sure what I want yet either, if I'm being honest. We should - a day. Just... At least tonight, rest. Recup.
[He sees Tim. Tired, worn threadbare, hurting. Just as angry and betrayed as himself and Algric, for different reasons. Jonah reaches one hand out, just. An offer, his voice low.]
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[There isn't any way around that. No excuses could cover it.]
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And he didn't trust them.
He rubs at his face. ]
Well, at least you got to kill him. There's the bright side.
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[Gods. He can't help how he fiddles with his fingers, rubbing at them absently. Not there, they weren't there- he can almost feel the line of where skin and bone had stopped if he focuses hard enough.]
I did.
[Maybe that was why he had gone. Of course there was the anger of being lied to and his trust broken, and maybe the strings he couldn't see tugging him, but maybe he'd also gone for his own revenge. His own wanting to end things on his own terms himself.]
...What now?
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What now. That's the question. ]
That's going to depend. I'm not going to pretend I'm not an absolute mess of ... everything right now. [ Smooth and elegant, Stoker. But he can't quite find a word that encompasses the maelstrom behind those very level words. ]
I want you to stay. I want to work things through. [ That was just the barest fraction bubbling up. He takes a deep breath. ] But I don't know what you want yet.
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[What does he want?
To live peacefully? To be understood? To take Elias' office and see everything? To take the throne below, his rightful position and his rite now that it's empty and calling-
Jonah moves both hands to under the table, one gripping the other tightly. Ignore the weird feeling of where his skin feels different along the knuckles. Feels a hairline crack in his ring.]
I'm not sure what I want yet either, if I'm being honest. We should - a day. Just... At least tonight, rest. Recup.
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[ He lets out a shaky breath, and feels a bit better for it. ]
Rest up, make sure you're okay. We'll work on things later.
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[He isn't.]
I just-
..Just...
[He sees Tim. Tired, worn threadbare, hurting. Just as angry and betrayed as himself and Algric, for different reasons. Jonah reaches one hand out, just. An offer, his voice low.]
I am sorry, Tim.