kayakking | (no subject)

[He gets his breath caught somewhere on the way out. As much as he loves Algric, he's also unsure about a lot of it. Different compared to Tim's absolute confidence in his motions. Jonah closes his eyes and soaks that contact in. Being with them, he's realized how touch starved he's been.]

Better results of this test, yes.

[There's just a tiniest scrape of teeth on the very last one before he pulls up and back a bit.]

You know the other necessary thing for science? Repetition.

Repetition.

[He sits back a little to look at him properly. Who would've known. Years ago, this could've been if he hadn't been so wrapped up his own arse.]

...You never did really answer my question before. When you brought all this up to me.

Give me a refresher? I'll do my best.

Why me?

[His arms wrap a little tighter, and he looks down searching his thoughts for a moment.]

There's a lot of ways to answer that.

[A fond smile here.]

... I'll be thorough, I think. Easiest first. So, the me of your timeline still took a pass at you in Research, right? I mean, superficial at the time, but I do have types.

Yes, you did back then.

[He remembers it and remembers thinking there was no way Tim was serious at the time.]

So here's this guy. Takes himself real serious, but also rolls with the teasing. Good looking. Smart as hell.

You know, I really couldn't tell at first if you just, weren't into dudes or just didn't realize you were being flirted with.

Or thought I was teasing you.

I definitely thought you were teasing.

I'm sure right at this very moment, in this very position, you'll be utterly shocked to know that I was not.

You would be right.

I still don't fully understand Martin wanting me let alone you.

Okay, first off? Martin is a catch.

[Plural Martin. Either or.]

No, I.

I know. It's why I don't understand him wanting me. Or you being interested.

Because I love you, you dumbass. There isn't criteria for that shit.

[Excuse him, he needs to process that.

Blinks once.

Knows it's honest and true.

But..]

Love me.

[He just... looks back on the WHY ARE YOU SHOCKED?]

Yeah?

Before it was just 'like'. Now it's love?

Yes. You, specifically.

[A beat.]

Expand.

[HE JUST.]

Should I make a PowerPoint? Oohhh, I could get some animations and transitions in there too.

[It is SUCH a Tim tone. Does the press of a kiss to Jonah's neck make it better or worse?]

[Worse, actually. Because he still doesn't understand. He goes still at the affection before exhaling and staring down at Tim, the look of a Jon frustrated trying to figure out a puzzle that's being uncooperative providing all the pieces.]

I'm being serious. I'm genuinely ask- never mind.

[Jonha rests his head back down against him. He does know Tim and if he hasn't answered by now, it'll just be something he has to accept. He's frustrated but... Not enough to get into it.]

[Luckily, Tim couldn't miss that. When Jonah deflates, the fight leaving him, Tim's arms tighten a little.]

Hey, no. Just... give me a minute. Like, I know. I know. I'm not shitting you or me. Some of us don't have the same command of language here, okay.

[He gives a bit of an inelegant huff at that.]

Not like I do either. That is all the... Monster part of me.

Mmm.

[That's a thoughtful sound with no comment after it. There's a ... lot there that he's mostly accepted but it runs up hard against one identity slamming against another.

That's not a conversation for now.

Jonah may sink a bit with the huge exhale Tim lets out, his head sinking back against the cushions.]

I mean. Where's that line between them? I don't know. I know I think about you all the time. Like, I want your dumb ass to be happy but I think I've always done that? But sitting just like this? Makes me happy in a way that's just. No, I want this, desperately, as long as I can.

[He does listen, both to the words, but also Tim's breathing and heartbeat. It's... Nice, in a way. But his voice is quiet. Tired.]

I guess I simply don't... Really understand why.